Friday 6PM

Friday 6PM ft. Bayance

Get to Know Me Questions

How would you describe yourself to a stranger?

Ooh well usually I’d just start with my name, age and where I’m from. But if I were to describe myself, I’d say I’m a people’s person who isn’t afraid to communicate her opinions and feelings and that I’m very passionate about justice, communities and turkish dramas (just kidding on the last one but hey, they’re really good)

What things would you say have shaped you as a person?

I’d say Islam is number one. Without it, I would’ve been completely different and probably lost. Also my experiences with people, reading and moving schools and homes a lot (getting to meet different people and being faced with different environments).

If your life was a movie what would it be called?

Hmm… “On Her Way To Save The World…once she stops procrastinating” Okay I really don’t know but my life so far might be “Mentally 40” or “Not Your Average Teenager”? So original, I know.

Which 3 songs are on the soundtrack to your life?

Oh man. I actually made a post called My Life In Songs describing my music phases so hehe, self plug there. But as in life, maybe Brave by Sara Bareilles, Never Be Enough and Titanium? I honestly don’t know.

Where do you see yourself in 10 years?

Finished University and possibly engaged? I also hope to go into law or a political field so maybe a job there.

Do you ever see yourself blogging full time?

Honestly if I got the chance to, I would. I don’t think so now because my blog is very life based and I can’t imagine it with millions of views haha. But who knows?

Who inspires you?

My parents are super hard working and I get it from them. Noor Tagouri inspires me as well but I’m trying not to follow people’s footsteps and be my own boss. And spiritually, I should look up to prophet Muhammad because he was the best of mankind and treated everyone with respect.

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General Mental Health Questions

What are your top five self care tips?

1.Smile (even when you’re not happy)

2.Reflect on your accomplishments no matter how small

3.Pray

4.Treat yourself (don’t go overboard but maybe a new outfit, a new meal..etc)

5.Take care of your hygiene and health (I need to follow this myself)

6.Bonus: TELL YOURSELF YOU BEAUTIFUL BECAUSE YOU ARE

How do you practice being kind?

SMILING! And complimenting people (it doesn’t have to be about looks). Just have a positive attitude and keep bad thoughts to yourself. It’s hard but with practise, being a positive person isn’t too hard.

What distractions do you find helpful?

I hate that I do distract myself but I really shouldn’t. Face a difficult situation head on and get it out of the way. But I distract myself by eating, watching Youtube and sleeping haha.

Does hearing other people’s stories help you manage your own mental health?

YES, it makes me so much more thankful and like I feel like I’m not alone. Sometimes people have advice for me and I have advice for them and it’s great connecting with people.

What do you think of the mental health area on social media that promotes/ romanticizes illness ?

ROMANTICIZES!! I know a lot of people disagree but ever since people started mentioning mental health a lot, rates have increased by SO much. I think people are having a hard time distinguishing between their emotions and name any hard or sad situations depression. And it sucks because now you can’t really tell the difference between someone who wants to be tumblr or someone who actually needs help. I think making mental health a little more private would be better. You don’t see people with cancer writing “very bad migraine today or back pain” on their stories. They seek medication instead which is what people should be doing here or at least talking to people privately.

Has being on social media affected your mental health and how?Do you think social media has a more positive or negative impact for someone struggling with their mental health?

NEGATIVE 100%%%. It has doubled my anxiety and literally anything I post I always second guess. Seeking validation has tried to suck me in multiple times and this drug called social media drains a lot of time spent on nothing and it just ends up making you feel worse because you’re constantly waiting for someone to message you and comparing your successes to other people. It’s terrible. In fact, yesterday, I unfollowed everyone on Instagram. Nothing to scroll hours on my feed and no stories that are so fake keeping me distracted. I’m done with it.

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Self Love

What is your biggest insecurity and why do you think you’re insecure about it?

Hmm my voice? It’s really annoying in sound recordings hahah. I’m not that insecure about my body anymore but maybe my face? Like I don’t know eyebags and I just don’t have the best structure at all angles. I honestly do not care anymore because I don’t understand why I’d thrive to look perfect. My body is healthy and functioning and my appearance doesn’t matter in the long run.

What was the first step you took to overcoming that insecurity?

I guess I just stopped looking in the mirror as often and weighing myself. I just didn’t care about the little details and focused on what I could control like my personality.

Do you have any advice on learning how to accept your flaws?

You are more beautiful than how you see yourself – I promise. We get too used to seeing ourselves but to someone else, we are beautiful in our own ways. Our flaws make us human and I think it’s important to remember that you do not need anyone’s validation to qualify for beauty.

Have you learnt to accept your body?

Yep! There are obviously times where I’m like wow this picture sucks with me in it but I honestly don’t care much anymore. It’s just a temporary structure that holds your soul and will decompose one day as well. It’ll be replaced with something better and it just reminds you that this life isn’t perfect. I feel like we ignore that our bodies isn’t what’s on the outside but the inside too. And I mean literally. Look at how your body works together – all the cells, nerves and neuron messages making up and protecting your body from diseases. God made us this way for a reason and we shouldn’t compare our bodies to others.

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Anxiety

What is your first memory of experiencing anxiety?

Grade 3 when I was overthinking. I was just thinking how we’re stuck in this sphere that’s rotating around the sun and how huge the universe is and how we’re going to die and the afterlife would be forever and aah forever and aah can I just undo my existence and aah it’s coming and aah time is passing by and gefyufbjhsj. I’ve accepted it and am now trying to work my way to prepare for what’s next but there are definitely still times where I’m still in shock with this all and how no one seems so sucked in to this world that they forget to really look around them and ask questions, me included.

What’s the worst thing about your struggles with anxiety

That the only way I can release it properly is to cry and pray. Which is good but isn’t too handy in public. So it just gets bottled up and I feel a pit in my stomach followed by a headache.

What’s your best tip for learning how to cope with anxiety?

Write it all down. Get it down on paper. Pray because God knows what’s in our hearts and what we’re struggling with and there are times when I’d be so overwhelmed and anxious and then after praying, I’d feel so relaxed like there’s no worries in the world. If you choose not to believe in God now, that’s your choice and you could always ask me questions but your soul needs care too and denying everything would just make it darker. Another way I cope is to cry. Your mental health is like a bladder sometimes and if you feel too much emotions, let it out. Just like how you’d pee or throw up, stress needs to be released too and I promise you’ll feel better after a good cry.

How has your anxiety affected your education?

Only last year. I was trying to work and the group behind me was talking really loudly and then I started to think about how I used to be part of a big group like that and then everything became so blurry and I started getting dizzy and my heart was beating fast and just all thoughts hit me at once and I had to leave the classroom. It sounds really pathetic but it happened a few times where I felt really down but it got way better. Sometimes we think bad days and feelings last forever but they don’t. I promise you, they don’t.

 

Thank you so much for having me, Chips! I loved answering these questions.

Bay’s blog

Bay’s Instagram

I started blogging because I needed a space where I didn’t feel restricted when it came to voicing my opinions and sharing my emotions and I found that, I found this amazing community of people who’ve changed my perspective about and opened my eyes to a lot of things.

I’m a better person because of those people.

From the very beginning, mental health was always something I wanted to talk about because it’s something very close to my heart and something I’ve struggled with for a very long time. Right from the get go I told myself that someday I would talk about my own issues, that, I would do it regardless… Continue reading FRIDAY 6PM

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xxxChips

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Thoughts

The Dating Process by Claire Cramphorn|The Series That Turned Me Into A Sobbing Mess

So I never do reviews. Like ever. I did one ages ago and I was looking back on it and it wasn’t as atrocious as I thought it would be. So congrats 13 year old me, you were a cool kid.

So if you’ve been reading my blog from the beginning or maybe even not so long ago, you’ve heard about Claire.

And if you haven’t yet here are a few posts with her name in them:

But to summarise she’s the most incredible human being and my cake sister and she’s a really special person in my life.

Describing the most influential person in my life

Girl Talk❤

Letters to Us

GET TO KNOW ME ||Q&A|| REFLECT WITH ME

So… umm…Claire wrote a series

Purchase The Dating Process

Check out Claire’s blog

My favourite person in the world spent the majority of last year writing a series: The Dating Process

Sometime around my birthday she told me she wanted to dedicate it to me and I didn’t think she was joking but it wasn’t until I opened the first book and read the dedication that it sunk in. I cried. Like A LOTTTTT. I turned into a waterfall for half an hour basically.

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I read the entire series in a week.

And maybe I’m a tad biased because I love her so much but it’s one of my favourite series ever!! And that’s saying something because I’m super picky. Despite me trying to prepare myself to read a series by one the best writers I know, I was blown away, there just aren’t enough words.

Rating:

★★★★★

It’s witty and beautiful and a lot of parts hit me hard. So although review might not be as good as others you’ve read, I tried, really damn hard to make it good

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Claire Cramphorn

➸ Jack and Alice

I

FELL

HARD

Like tumble head over over heels fall down a rabbit hole type fall for Jack. And then there was Alice, and it genuinely felt like I was staring at a reflection of me and my life (specifically my relationship with my dad and my half siblings) and it hurt but it also made me feel comforted and not alone and it was everything I needed and more. Plus I totally shipped them even if I did want Jack for myself #Jalice

➸OTP of The Year Award Goes To…

I genuinely have never read a book with a better duo and I read 100+ books a year. The chemistry between Jack and Tommy was magical, I don’t think I’ve ever laughed so hard at some point during the kitchen conversation I WAS CRYING! This was the OTP I needed and Claire delivered and you need to read it for yourself because it was precious!

➸FEMINISM!!

I was going “YASS QUEEN!’ and”Mhmm” and nodding with approval the whole time. I was all for it, every step of the way. It was like this no BS guide to feminism. And I want everyone to read it, I want to go around the world shoving copies of The Dating Process into the hands of everyone but especially teens because the messages in each book are so important.

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Casey:

People always say…

Don’t hate the player, hate the game.

I say…

Don’t play games with the girl who can play better.

I never wanted to start dating. I got tricked. (Emotionally blackmailed, actually.) By one of my very best friends.

I wasn’t exactly thrilled about it. I actively didn’t want to date anybody. I especially didn’t want to date some loser who was desperate to be set up with me.

I. Just. Wasn’t. Interested.

Then I heard something.

And straight away I knew…

Those guys? They weren’t your average losers. They were up to something.

And me? Well, I wasn’t about to let them get away with it.

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Thoughts

the less than adequate math student’s guide to not failing

Don’t even @ me, if none of these work. I probably failed too.

I’m kidding, totally kidding*

It’s that time of the year, and as always I’m late with a post that should’ve gone up earlier but had to be rewritten because I accidentally deleted it and forgot about completely but hey, it’s here now.

*I’m being deadly serious

These tips aren’t anything special, and I have no doubt in my mind that you’ve heard them before but you’re here, still reading, which means whatever *insert person’s name here* told you was a lie and you’ve come to me to save you.

Which is probably the worst thing you could do considering my math grades have been filled with D’s since the third grade.

Are you still reading?

Wow, you either have tons of faith in me or are just using this time to procrastinate. But I’ve wasted enough of your time so here you go, 3 things that might just save you:

Youtube

Now don’t get me wrong, I don’t have anything against teachers. I think they’re wonderful people and my English teachers give me good grades I don’t deserve but some of them lack what all my English teachers so far have had: the ability to get me to understand whatever irrelevant topic they’re teaching

Which is where Youtube comes in. And it won’t just solve your issues with math, it’ll save you in a bunch of other areas too.

Fall asleep during class and have homework assigned to you which you don’t understand? Youtube. Looking for more ways to procrastinate? Youtube. Trying to figure out how to achieve Cara Delevigne’s eyebrows? Youtube.

Just type in the topic and thank me later.

Holidays

This is for all you angels who did the bare minimum throughout the entirety of 2018, somehow passed and are now in a predicament because you know your lack of work is coming back to bite you.

Use the time you have during the holidays! Now I’m not saying everyday because NOBODY (me) cares enough about a grade to do that BUT taking some time away from your busy schedule mainly consisting of watching Gossip Girl reruns won’t hurt you.

I basically buy my textbooks in advance and then start learning the topics beforehand, not in a bunch of detail but enough so that I’m able to understand what’s going on.

This saves me from looking like an idiot on the first day because I’m able to understand more than just the first 5 minutes of the lesson.

Make Detailed Notes

Math is about all about practice but practice won’t save you 10 minutes before your final math exam when you realise you don’t know nearly as much as you thought you did. But the notes you made next to the million math problems you forced yourself to do will. Make them basic. Make them easy to understand, we’re talking 5 year old child understandable.

Just make sure you have them.

breaking bad help GIF

And that’s it. You don’t have to by me flowers or anything, besides, I prefer cake but I would like a shoutout in your valedictorian speech.

But if this advice doesn’t in fact save you, remember math is stupid,you’re incredible and you don’t need math or a grade to prove your worth.
xxxChips

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Friday 6PM

Friday 6PM ft. Jennifer Bethany

Be the person you needed as a kid…

I’ve been going on about this series for a while now and I’m so thrilled to share this with you. A big thank you to Jennifer, who this wouldn’t have been possible without and to all of you for your endless support and kind words. If you’d like to learn more about Friday 6PM or possibly be a part of it I’ve left all the info at the end, but I’ve rambled enough,let’s get straight into it.

Get to Know Me questions

 

How would you describe yourself to a stranger?

 I would say, “I’m a short, wild haired, goal obsessed, ball of energy!”

If your life was a movie what would it be called?

 ‘How to Move Mountains’

Which 5 songs are on the soundtrack to your life?

1. Dreams by The Cranberries

2. Wolves by Selena Gomez

3. Better by Maggie Rogers

4. Dreams by Fleetwood Mac

5. You Learn by Alanis Morissette

What are some of your short term goals?

1. Financial Freedom

2. Get my small business off the ground

3. Stay being consistent

Do you ever see yourself blogging full time?

Yes, writing is my passion and I seriously pray that one day I can say I’m a full time blogger.

Who inspires you?

Rachel Hollis, hands down.

What advice would you give to your younger self?

“Listen boo, chin up. Respect yourself. Love yourself so fully that you don’t need any “man” to. Shush your mouth, get up for work and hustle. Write down your goals, actually have goals. Speak up for yourself. Don’t take yourself so serious. Life is fun and beautiful. Live in the present. Send handwritten notes to your friends. Live a little, live responsibly.”

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General Mental Health Questions

Why do you think mental health has been a topic people avoided talking about for such a long time?

I think people avoided it, because they were told to. It was taboo, because people said it was. Everyone expected their lives to come off as prim and proper, there wasn’t room for mental illness. It was shameful. But now, I think mostly due to internet access and social media, our human connection has become so great that we realized, ‘hey this isn’t so taboo, there’s a lot of other people out there like me”. And I think that’s truly beautiful progression.

Do you think receiving an official diagnosis matters?

Nope, I really don’t. I think self awareness is really powerful and that’s the first step to realizing you need help.

How do you deal with family/people that don’t understand or believe you about your mental health issues?

I’ve really not come across anyone that has challenged my eating disorder or depression. If someone were to, I’d simply ignore it. I know my truth and that’s all that matters.

Does time really heal?

Time really does heal all wounds. There’s no set time frame on when it’ll happen, but yes one morning you will wake up and your pain won’t be the first thing you think of.

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Eating disorders

When did you first begin to feel like you needed to get help?

I never initially felt like I needed help for an eating disorder. I truly just felt like I was dieting and doing a damn good job. It wasn’t until I went to my general practitioner for help with my depression that I was put on Celexa (antidepressant) and began to gain weight from that medicine. It wasn’t until I gained healthy weight back, that I realized I had a problem.

How did your parents and friends react to finding out about your eating disorder?

My mom was fighting cancer at the time. She had 13 surgeries over the course of 3 years. She didn’t realize I had a problem, because she just was going through so much. I know, looking back, my dad was worried. He would say things like, “you don’t eat enough to keep a bird alive.” and he would fix me food sometimes in an attempt to help. No one else ever said anything to me about my anorexia until after I was healthy again. They said things like, “Yeah you did get really small. I was worried.” But that didn’t do much for me in my struggle.

What’s the worst reaction you’ve had to telling someone about your eating disorder, and how has that experience taught you to deal with negative reactions since then?

I’ve not had a bad reaction. I recently for the first time talked about my eating disorder publicly on my blog. I had a lot of women come to me and thank me for sharing. Some even told me about their current eating disorder they are seeking help for and they are in my prayers so fiercely

What was the turning point for you that motivated you to start your recovery journey?

I realized after my kidney transplant that I’d never took the time to allow myself to heal from my ED. I decided that since I got a new lease on life, I wasn’t going to let my ED creep back in and control my life. I decided I would be in control this time around and would be the healthiest version of me that I can possibly achieve.

What’s been the hardest thing about your recovery?

Self talk. Not allowing myself to talk down on myself. I practice looking at my reflection and say out loud the things I love, even if it’s hard.

What are a few things you wish you’d known at the start of your recovery journey?

I wish I had known that talking about it, is okay. That talking about it would lead to ultimate healing.

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Body image

As you’ve got older, have you become more or less self-conscious about your body?

Much less self-conscious.

What was the largest contributing factor to the security/lack of security you have in your body?

Growing up I had a lot of people in my life that would comment negatively on my body. Their voices lingered in my mind for years and eventually morphed into my own voice. Beating that voice, changing that voice in my head, has been a life changer.

Do you think teenage boys or girls have a worse body image and why?

Honestly, I think it is probably more intense within teenagers in general. Especially now with social media. It’s so easy for them to see thousands of girls and guys who are what they would consider “average people” on Instagram that are “body goals” or “insta models” or whatever they put into the world. Those things are fine, but I think a younger audience is more swayed by that and it can be really damaging to a not fully matured mind.

What advice would you give someone with poor body image?

Love yourself fully. Find the motivation deep inside you to fight for yourself. You’re more than worth it. Your body is strong, it’s a temple, it’s a vessel. Take care of it and your body image will improve by tenfold. Speak your self-love into existence!

Jennifer’s blog

Jennifer’s Twitter

Jennifer’s Instagram

I started blogging because I needed a space where I didn’t feel restricted when it came to voicing my opinions and sharing my emotions and I found that, I found this amazing community of people who’ve changed my perspective about and opened my eyes to a lot of things.

I’m a better person because of those people.

From the very beginning, mental health was always something I wanted to talk about because it’s something very close to my heart and something I’ve struggled with for a very long time. Right from the get go I told myself that someday I would talk about my own issues, that, I would do it regardless… Continue reading FRIDAY 6PM

Lets chat (4)

xxxChips

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